[Cosmosdex] The Universal Encyclopedia


Mxr. Crescendi

Nuisance without nuance / Raevil

Mxr. Crescendi
“Don't let him finish any sentence that could end in getting a discount.” — Advice to bartenders on them

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  • Strength-2
  • Intelligence-5
  • Charisma-7
  • Endurance-6
  • Agility-4
  • Luck-7

Age: Kouini
Size: 5'11" ft tall
Species: Kouini

Job: Drunken freeloader
Likes: Business Cards, Dancing, Deals, Diplomatic Events, Drinking, Favors, Parties
Dislikes: Being in Custody, Having to Pay, Regulations, Repetition
Notable contributions: One of the very first con-man to claim they represent an ominous shadow government, and spreads conspiracy theories surrounding it. A fair example of why articles on people who have made no meaningful contribution except being a nuisance are still written.

[Clumsy] Neutral trait
"Oh, was that your glass?"
[Mimic] Neutral trait
Characters with this trait have a tendency of very frequently picking up just about anything from the speech and actions of people around them, as well as media they consume.
[Sarcastic] Neutral trait
This character has no sense of sarcasm and isn't likely to use it. This trait doesn't mean that they are unlikely to miss sarcasm.
[Charming Drunk] Positive trait
This character will receive a small bonus in charisma when they are wasted. This does not make them any less drunk.
[Jack] Positive trait
This character knows about a lot and if the situation calls for it they are able to do many things outside of their job title with no formal education on the subject. This character will not be the best at it or particularly good but will be able to do it.
[Streetsmart] Positive trait
This character knows the streets very well and knows when things are going wrong. This character is also the opposite of gullible and knows all the tricks in the book, and they'll be happy to call it out.
[Compulsive Liar] Negative trait
This character is obsessed with being clean and will refuse to do dirty jobs. If they do get dirty somehow, they will suffer a sanity loss. This character will also keep their living environment as clean as they're able, and can get frustrated if it's dirtied up.
[Naughty] Negative trait
"Bet you weren't expecting that~"

Original Creator: LoverIan

Physical Description

Never caught outside of crimson formalwear Mxr Crescendi is best described as 'dressed to the nines' for any situation. Their frame fills out the suit as if their body had been tailored to it rather than the other way around. With claims of being a full contractor their actual anatomy betrays this and leads most to believe that they are actually a kounini who has dyed their fur.

Nevertheless they are never spotted without four ears, goatee, and wide pupils. Outside this many smaller details like height, hair-style or length, accessories, and the like will differ without known rhyme or reason.


Mxr Crescendi is best characterized by the history of their interactions: Similar to someone who yells fire in a crowded movie theater every single word, action, and step they take is put towards the purpose of not having to lift a finger in the future. While not overtly lazy this often takes the form of heading to a planet with a government that is in need of an informant, using altruistic programs to their own benefit, using imitation as a form of flattery, or merely being the type of person you want to buy a drink for at a bar. They are not known to waste time on lost causes and will often turn their attention to the next best thing that they can should plans go awry.

When times get tough they are often seen making more bold moves such as feeding into mob mentality. In the end it becomes clear to everyone around them that the true intent of the bumbling kounini that they just want a free ride.

Past these surface level actions Mxr Crescendi has claimed that they are an ambassador from a still unknown species and their shadow government, and that they were very well trained by their people. However it has been concluded that they are at best a disgraced political official from some planet in the universe, so much so that they've resorted to begging and any means necessary.


There is no known early life history nor is there any known prior to their claimed conversion to contractor status or first sighting. When asked they have responded with a variety of statements that generally boil down to teasing humor or dry sarcasm turned at who asks them. At some point within the AI era the first sighting of Mxr Crescendi happened although they claim that they'd been hanging around for "much longer than you might think dear". This began the long history of their interactions.




• A currently estimated value of the possessions Mxr Crescendi has broken that they did not own runs past the billions of credits at current time. Attempting to receive compensation for such an incident in any way shape or form is pointless due to the kounini weaseling their way out of having to do so.

• Will gladly go above and beyond for a bottle of brewdian ale, but sometimes enjoys a good generic-style Drug.

• At this time nobody has come forward as having had a personal relationship with Mxr Crescendi before they became publically known. While having to be reminded that this article was necessary is not a desired circumstance there is a 5000 credit reward for doing so. This offer can only be redeemed by a maximum of one person, and due to repeated attempts to do so with false identities Mxr Crescendi has had to be banned from self-reporting new information on themself. By contacting Cosmosdex Staff for this purpose you are formally agreeing to the following: "You are not Mxr Crescendi, you are in no meaningful way previously Mxr Crescendi or intending to be in the future, and you are not reporting information provided by Mxr Crescendi or on the behalf of Mxr Crescendi."

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