[Cosmosdex] The Universal Encyclopedia



Murderous Jelly Man / The Mailman

“You know that feeling when you want to die, but you can't because you know you got something wrong with you, and you feel like you've got to fix it before you go? Because I certainly don't.” — MJM on suicide

No art currently, maybe you can help

  • Strength-3
  • Intelligence-8
  • Charisma-5
  • Endurance-2
  • Agility-10
  • Luck-4

Age: 36
Size: 6'2 ft tall
Species: Spiraji

Job: Hitman
Likes: Killing Artemis units, going through people's things, Nice ladies who give him chocolate
Dislikes: Artemis Units, People getting in the way of his job, Paperwork
Notable contributions: One of the most effective AI killers out there.

[Chip Magnet] Positive trait
This character's Charisma is boosted to a 10 with robots and AIs. Robots and AIs will commonly find this character attractive.
[Popular] Positive trait
This character is popular around others and tends to know just the right words to use in a situation. Characters are less likely to look negatively on this character and morale raises while speaking to them.
[Unstable] Negative trait
This character automatically loses sanity each day and loses sanity and morale more quickly than other characters as well. This character most likely needs therapy to function normally.
[Goner] Negative trait
This character's fate is sealed. They will never receive a miracle roll, and they simply die instead.
[Intrusive] Negative trait
This character has no sense of personal space and might do rude things like going through people's belongings, touching people and asking personal questions. This can be tiring for their fellow crew and could get them into deep trouble.
[Oblivious] Neutral trait
This character is not good at reading emotion and may appear insensitive without meaning to. Many of the people around this character seem to get that they are oblivious to what they are saying or doing and are more willing to forgive.
[Masochist] Neutral trait
This character is just wired up a little differently from most. They gain some morale when hurt.
[EMP] Ability trait
This character is capable of generating electromagnetic pulses to disable, damage or destroy equipment, robots, or those otherwise susceptible to an electromagnetic pulse. Whether as part of their body or being trained to use these, the character is not susceptible to their own EMPs.

Original Creator: Fish TNP

Physical Description

MJM is a light green spiraji who wears the screen of his first kill, an Artemis unit, on his neck. Somedays, it's the only thing he bothers wearing though when on the job he will most certainly wear a laser proof breastplate, a wrinkled dress shirt, and his weapon belt. The outside of these clothes are very plain and the weapon belt is only fit with a silenced laser gun and a knife. However, the inside of these clothes are beautifully patterned with extraordinary color variations.

Even for a spiraji, MJM looks quite lean and cunning though his head crest is just about nonexistent. His power cell in the middle of his chest features an upside-down heart and his lightning-patterned power cords and thin vats are a soft yellow. Like all spiraji, he is able to turn invisible for a short period of time though this ability is practically useless to him since the Artemis unit screen that he refuses to take off is unable to turn invisible with him.


MJM is definitely wildly eccentric, to say the least, but he doesn't seem to be aware that he is. In fact, MJM seems to be completely unaware of most things such as the various romantic gestures towards him from AIs and the negative emotions of other people. While MJM looks and acts as serious as a gritty noir detective, his actions definitely do not fit his demeanor. One time he gifted his assassination target a terribly rendered Holiday card before their death despite the fact that the day it was sent wasn't even close to a holiday. When questioned about this during an underground news segment, MJM comments that he couldn't find a card that said Happy Deathday unironically, so he just got something that he thought looked nice. "You know, to make their death day more comfortable for them."

Overall, he's quite an innocent and serious fellow in his casual life though if you give him a gun, loads of money and a target, he would not hesitate to kill said target especially if they're an Artemis unit. In fact, he'll even revel in the kill though he has shown guilt and regret on occasion. However, MJM is always the one to live in the moment and will quickly forget why he was so guilt-stricken in the first place once taken away from the scene of the kill. This may or may not be a result of his emotional instability though his former friends have commented that he has always been like that with everyday mistakes.

His ability to kill AIs is ridiculously effective and most criminal organizations hire him just for that. However, he is willing to take up an organic kill for a high enough price. He also sometimes has sudden bouts of lucidity where he either quits his mercenary job briefly or refuses to take up jobs that he deems as immoral. He always comes back though, sometimes more bloodthirsty than he was before.

MJM strangely doesn't regret his inability able to save his sister from death which he always feels incredibly guilty about no matter what state he's in.


MJM took this death calmly, seemingly unaffected by it, and then one day it hit him hard. His sister was dead. He lashed out at the few people who knew him due to the stress of it all. He and his sister spent their whole lives attempting to avoid getting in the middle of the criminal lifestyle, and yet it came to them both anyway. It was going to get worse too.

A rival mafia group to the one the Artemis unit belonged to took notice of MJM and honed in on him. At his lowest point, with the few other friends he had avoiding him so they could give him space as he mourned, this mafia played their pity cards just right. They told MJM that they were greatly sorry for what happened, and offered to help him kill the Artemis. They knew the location where the Artemis was. They had the weapons to blast the robot up. "All for you kid" are the words they used against him.

They offered to be his new family. He rejected at first but they asked again and again, and the constant reminders of his sister's death started to erode his emotions. Their sly words were starting to convince him the only way he was going to feel better was if he took revenge. They took him out to places. They were starting to feel like friends, family even. They put a gun in his hand and taught him how to use it.

"Family helps family, kid."

Together they tracked down and killed the Artemis unit just three months after his sister's funeral. The deed was done. No one is quite sure if killing the Artemis actually made him feel better, maybe not even him. Soon after the mafia helped him to escape his homeplanet. Something he wanted to do before to escape all the crime on the planet. Now he was doing it to get into crime with his new "family."

A few years past before MJM showed up again as a hitman, his specialty being AI assassinations. Surprisingly, very little about him has changed though the EMP powers and his new personality are certainly new. Nobody really knows how he changed in just a few short years, especially the EMP powers which he didn't have before. Most people point their fingers at the mafia he escaped with before molding him into this.


Temporary Transparency: He is able to become invisible for a short amount of time though it's not like he uses this ability frequently.


• MJM's name does not actually stand for Murderous Jelly Man. It's just a joke name that developed on an infamous internet forum. His actual name is Michael Jinobi Miradam.

• He may be asexual, but he's definitely a romantic.

• MJM is actually very aware of himself and of his situation. The fact that he tried to avoid falling into a life of crime, only for it to come banging on his door and forcing him to join it, is something he's fully aware of. He hasn't forgotten where he came from. It's just that he would rather pretend otherwise.

Image Gallery

No art currently, maybe you can help.