[Cosmosdex] The Universal Encyclopedia

[Cosmosdex]

Fibrae
     

Hairdoudes / Evo-Addicts

Fibrae
“LET IT BE KNOWN HERE, TODAY, THAT WE WILL NOT BOW DOWN TO THE SAVAGES WHO BELIEVE CURLY HAIR IS THE FUTURE. WE ARE PREPARED TO FIGHT FOR WHAT WE BELIEVE IS RIGHT! GNARLY HAIRSTYLES! AND AS WE ALL KNOW, CURLY HAIR IS NOT GNARLY. IT IS FAILURE, BRANDISHED IN AN ALL NEW, HAIR SPRAY COATED, PACKAGING. WE SHALL LEAD THE FIBRAE TO VICTORY! WE SHALL WIN THIS WAR! LONG LIVE THE AFRO REIGN!” — Speech by Bangs Von Bouffant, the 17th dictator of Tuftiana

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  • Strength-5
  • Intelligence-1
  • Charisma-9
  • Endurance-5
  • Agility-1
  • Luck-5

Common Jobs: Stylist, Priest, Maid, Ruthless Dictator
Likes: Hair care products, Overall cleanliness, Evofluid
Dislikes: Mud, Dirt, Baldness, Parasites, Objectively incorrect hairstyle choices

Attack Method: Strangulation through the use of hair-like organs.

Attributes
Homeplanet: Unknown/Not Important
Lifespan: 160 years
Size: 4 ft tall
Diet: Anything, even trash, although only clean trash

Bodytype: Tangle
Type: Other
Social Class: Lower Middle Class
Rarity: Uncommon
Common Traits
[Echolocator] Neutral trait
This character utilizes echolocation to sense their surroundings, essentially giving them 360 degree vision at the cost of color blindness and relative short sightedness.
[Robust Genetics] Positive trait
This character has a very strong genetic base. The odds that any new mutation will be beneficial are greatly increased.
[Clean Freak] Negative trait
This character is obsessed with being clean and will refuse to do dirty jobs. If they do get dirty somehow, they will suffer a sanity loss. This character will also keep their living environment as clean as they're able, and can get frustrated if it's dirtied up.
Gods

The fibrae worship one of two gods, The Generous Barber, originator of all that be gnarly, or The Great Cowlick, ender of all hairstyles.

These gods are in constant opposition of each other and as such, most religious conflicts on Tuftiana arise from their devotees.


Gods: The Generous Barber, The Great Cowlick

Original Creator: Enforcer


Physical Description

Fibrae are best described as semi amorphous bundles of hair-like organs attached to a smallish, bumped core that they will usually present as their head. Although they are capable of reforming their hair into many shapes and comfortable with any form of movement, the fibrae will usually mimic the average biped rather than say, a quadruped, with a simple two legs and two to eight arms.

The fibrae have a grand total of two, technically three organs that make up their body. There's the core, which is made out of a liquid-like cellulous matter which handles digestive and mental functions through a single, unified chemical process in which they just sort of shove food inside of their heads. Next is the solidified horn-reminiscent-bumps which at one point had a legitimate biological reason for existing, but are now just fancy accessories. Then finally their masterful hair tendrils are the remaining organ.

The super-organ, after which the species are named, deals with every single other function a living being could possibly need. The tendrils are movement, opposable thumbs, weapons, shields, great tools for pickpocketing, cozy pillows, thick coats to protect against the cold, incredibly fashionable hairstyles, and much more.

In fact, although the core usually comes bearing expressive "eyebrows" these are in reality, simply just more hair tendrils which happen to be trimmed in order to communicate more aptly with other species through the use of facial expressions, a trick recently integrated into fibrae culture. Older fibrae might just have a smooth core and as such the pseudo eyebrows can be used to differentiate different generations. Underneath these "eyebrows" lie no organs that deal with sight, rather the tendrils constantly emit and catch soundwaves, functioning, in addition, as echolocators and vocal chords.

If one listens closely enough, they'll find that fibrae constantly emit a low hum which they use to be able to see their surroundings. Although a small amount of them prefer this hum to be a song, to alleviate the monotony of life ever so slightly.

Fibrae are known to constantly be in contact with evofluid on their day to day life, using it as spices for their food since it tastes "tingly", using it as shampoo, and even using it in swimming pools and washrooms, and because of this, its not rare to find a highly mutated fibrae even despite them being capable of getting rid of any obtained mutations through decently slow genetical adaptation.

In the end, to the fibrae mutations are stylistic choices and as such they are free to collect as many as they want. It's important to note that home-planet bound fibrae usually consider mutations tacky and as such participate in "organ purges" at the end of every month, a ritual in which they clear themselves of any impurities they may have obtained during their time living their lives and go back to their simple 3 total organs.

Finally, it is very common for a fibrae to have eccentric hairstyles as much of their culture and societal status revolves around style.

Personality

Most people will describe the fibrae as the epitome of the "Surfer-Dude" personality. They are usually quite laid back and very welcoming to new people and ideas, recommending certain hairstyles that they believe would fit their look, excitedly debating the philosophical and ethical aspects of braids (for hours on end), or maybe even flirting with other species on their first meeting.

Most people, however, do not know that one should never, ever, put a fibrae in a position of leadership, as they will easily become drunk on their newfound power and turn into ruthless dictators that will rule with an iron hair-fist, squashing any attempts at rebellion through the use of intimidation or hand-twisting and personally making sure that their new rules are enforced strictly.

On the off chance a crew isn't willing to compromise with their newfound glorious leader forcing certain hairstyles on everyone then the fibrae will usually turn back to normal after a quick coup.

They are not power hungry, only power drunk.

They are, in addition, famously stressed out by unclean environments despite what is usually an attitude so "chill" that it sometimes borders on apathetic due to the ease their hair presents in getting dirty.

Fibrae forced to be in a dirty room without being permitted to clean up will slowly and silently progress from nervously "glancing" at the grimy spot with their eyebrows every now and then, to awkwardly laughing and making jokes that hint that somebody should really eventually clean that up, to inevitably having a breakdown and incoherently screaming while desperately wiping away with the closest thing available. Even if they're not in any danger of getting dirty themselves. Even if they're not even in the same room as it. Sometimes fibrae enter buildings, notice a grimy spot in the ceiling, leave the building while desperately trying to act like they saw nothing, and come back months later, clearly having missed out on weeks of sleep, armed with nothing but the latest in cleaning equipment.

Many would think that this implies that they are a horrible mix with more dirty species, but in actuality they consider cleaning a form of catharsis, and as such will happily clean up after others as long as they are explicitly told that they are allowed to.

Footnote: A fibrae's screams are rated as some of the most blessed sounds ever recorded due to the unique constitution of their vocal cords, and as such, it is recommended to never allow a fibrae to progress to that stage in the presence of dirt.

History

The fibrae are theorized to be the descendants of an invasive species upon their planet, most likely released by spacefarers. Even though their ancestor was considered a harmless, cute, and fluffy, pet, they quickly became an extremely dominant species on their newfound home.

Although the cold of Tuftania was originally a problem for them, they soon evolved their gene editing, and with it, extremely thick coats of hair that would one day become their pride and joy. With their newfound mastery over evolution, they quickly started to fill whatever niches they could in their snowy mountain territory, even at one point, becoming their own predators as they had already caused the extinction of most life forms on the planet. In fact, geological efforts on Tuftiana reveal unrecognizable ecosystems buried under the snow that are atleast 400% more varied than the current hairy one. It was only a matter of time for them to evolve intelligence, and so, they promptly did.




Fibrae evolutionary history pre-civilized society is extremely extensive, and a topic of wide research, and so the Cosmosdex team would like to apologize for shortening it to just two paragraphs. However, if we were to truly delve into the subject, not only would we be unable to do it justice, but this section would end up being longer than all the others combined. For that reason, the rest of this section will be dedicated to post tool usage.




With primitive agriculture deep in the caves of Tuftiana, nestled by volcanic activity in what amounts to the only area in the planet capable of agriculture, came gatherings which would eventually become tribes. With the creation of tribes and job distribution came more free time to learn about their world, with this free time came tools, and with these tools came combs.

Although arguably the most important invention for the fibrae, surpassing even the wheel in usage, the comb was both their benefactor and destroyer. With fashion came culture. With culture came religion. And with religion, came bloodshed. They had obtained "nasty in the good way" and "sick" hairstyles, the differentiating aspect between different fibrae tribes, and what would eventually become the origin of the Houses of Hair lineages that rule Tuftiana today, but at what cost?

Because of their lust for vanity, their lust for the ability to present themselves with personality and pride, the fibrae had to suffer through countless wars. While most species stop having wars between themselves after the 5th or 6th major war, the fibrae are currently on the 283rd "Great Lushious Inquisition" and counting.

While the sacred texts of most species would utilize fruits such as apples or meat originating from beings such as the ever-present crabs to represent the origin of sin, the origin of guilty pleasure, death, lawlessness, and chaos, for the fibrae it was combs. To the fibrae combs are romantic concepts, the object that granted hairkind thoughts and intelligence, civility and peace, was also the origin of truly harrowing wars. Many fibrae philosophers discuss if combs were either a blessing or a curse. The consensus seems to be, that combs are both.

A far cry from their origins as cute stress relief pets on spaceships, the fibrae had become a race well versed in war with each other. As religious conflicts over the nature of hair intensified, one of these wars eventually caught the eye of yet another spacefarer, whose interference and consequent recruiting into the House of Sideburns ended up catapulting them into the grand stage of space.

Today, they serve as the pillars of the hairstyle ecosystem, ambassadors from the world of cleanliness, and widely respected authorities on the prospects of evolution as is the case with the smarter, perfect fibraes.

Subspecies

Perfect fibrae: Perfect fibrae are smaller, more compact versions of normal fibrae which have finally shed their bumps, and therefore, finally truly only have two organs and a completely smooth core. They are considerably far smarter than the average fibrae, with some famously known for secretly puppeteering their dumber brethren. Usually not religious, perfect fibrae couldn't care less what hairstyles other people wish to have. They despise having to share space with the average fibrae, and as such they are mostly found in space, away from their home planet.

Perfect fibrae don't bother mimicking bipeds and instead, are simply best described as hair urchins.

Feral fibrae: Feral fibrae are the result of rare, dormant, and ancient predatory genes reawakening. They are huge, hulking beasts with hair that dampens sound instead of rebounding it which makes them functionally invisible to the average fibrae. Their horns, equally massive, are plenty useful for devastating prey when headbutting, and their freakishly strong hair tendrils useful for simply overpowering and crushing a victim between their many arms.

Despite being extremely dangerous predators, they are quite dumb. In an emergency situation standing still may trick them into thinking one is in actuality just a weirdly shaped rock formation.

Balds: Balds are fibrae that have long lost the ability to grow hair, leaving them a shade of their former selves. Most will reshape their cores from simple spheres into miniature bipedal shapes in an extremely painful process in order to not lose locomotive functions. Sometimes balds have tiny mustaches, the only remaining sign of what was once their pride.

Fibrae do not consider balds a member of their own species, commonly shunning them and at times even attacking them when encountered.

To this day, balds remain some of the only non-religious and non-dirt-related subjects capable of stripping fibrae of their chill, and as such it is unlikely bald support groups will progress much in the next decade.

Special

Gene Editing: The fibrae's special genetic constitution allows them to actively make tweaks to their RNA, making minor changes that allow them to survive in most environments. Because of this, even in the harshest of deserts, fibrae will not find themselves overencumbered by their thick mane, rather finding the wind refreshing.

Thanks to their impressive control over genes, the fibrae have systematically gotten rid of almost all of their organs, instead having combined what they once were into the multiuse super organ that is their hair. Their horns/bumps survived the purge simply because they found them a cool accessory to their hairstyles.

Trivia

• Due to an oversight in the 2nd gnarly constitution established by Pompadoure the Tyrant during the "Bowl Cut Wars", the selling of wigs made out of fibrae hair can technically be interpreted as a war crime of the highest order, trespassing upon the honor and glory of the species as a whole, and punishable by the live execution of everyone with even a minor connection to the culprit. This includes people with political protection such as ambassadors, religious idols, and worst of all, pets.

Despite this, most fibrae consider it a really cute compliment.

• Feral fibrae somehow manage to care even less about what it is they're eating than normal fibrae, and as such cannibalistic tendencies are not beyond them. Because of this, they are the focus of much of fibrae culture, with the most known fairy tales being cautionary tales about wandering too far through the snow on the surface, lest they be eaten by the invisible monster of split ends.

• Fibrae cuisine is infamous for being a contender for the #1 worst tasting, most akin to literal poison, and most traumatic food in the universe. Whether this is because they lack taste buds, their almost obsessive abuse of evofluid as a "spice", or because the plate will inevitably be plagued by hundreds of their strands of hair is something most scientists are unable to figure out.

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