Piss-take on Timelessness
1. To be protected from the onslaught of time, one must realize that time innt real. It is an invention, a fib, a fallacious panacea created to sell tonic water and launch ships in circles. To be protected from the Dali Blight, one must take into their whole sense of being the idea and superreality which is timelessness. Cut off the hands of the watch without making a motion. If forced to walk, do so not forwards or backwards, but in a new synthesis of forwards and backwards. If not that, then sideways like a crab—let your cancer spread from one's spot in the sand. Speak out of turn. Turn out of speak. Confound and befuddle the on-watching Time and it will give up the ghost that it is, accepting the non-existence which gives truth to its lie.
2. Preheat hotbox to 1500°Ll. Grease your pan.
8. Disband all need for order. A line goes thisaway and thataway and it is still a line, no? Perhaps cut it up a bit? You will still get the sense of linitude, but now without being diminished by the obligation of continuum. You are not defined by your order, by your rank, by your place. You are defined by you, an inextinguishable essence which cannot be seen or felt by the great movers and shakers and organizers and bunko gamers and generals and savants and presidents and middle managers and bottom managers and mercenary lizards and directors and critics and movie ushers and control freaks and stubborn writhing masses of ooze plus tentacle plus gray matter and garbage pickers and inventory takers and trash compactors of these worlds.
10. Take down any calendars you have. Tackle them ruthlessly. Wrestle them to the ground, smother them in the mud, and tear their composite squares bit from bit. Reassemble the pieces into a time-cube, a time-pentahedron, a time-dodecahedron, a time-centahedron, a time-megahedron, or what have you. Now roll the die. This is your new way of reckoning events.
2. Put head in hotbox. Let bake for seven parts of non-time.
5. Cancel all appointments. If someone wishes to see you, simply be in their presence. One doesn't need to be reminded to coincide with others; there are many others. If others won't make time for you, you are dispensable to time. If you make yourself indispensible through the practicing of timelessness, you can be as boisterous and demanding as you like. No one will have the courage to refuse you, much less criticize you to your face. They may moan behind your back, but how does that affect you? I know you are reading this.
3. Yeu. A'eaeoé Eieuouaÿe.
12. Cancel the appointment with death. One cannot die if there is no final breath. Idiots who die only do so because they forget this vital fact, and their vitals cease because they consciously decide at some point to make a final breath. Following the stream of time, they stop by the creekbed at some point, and think to themselves, "Hmm, fancy time to not breathe." But not me. I am forever. I will live forever
21. U aí ee Öea'olla. Ío aieo, ío aie'a ello, ee ío eieueOue. Ío ell'ai-o aíe ee aiuelle— y. O e o üo'o. O'oe eaeoU'i aí eo—elláo, ía ellüe'e... ío eaoïo ee Oeieuoí'e—e eyo'o oe ué y.
A. ⫗ ��? ⫘ ��? ⫖��?⫕
$$. Ooue baby yeah
14. Interrupt all and sundry. Especially, interrupt the timekeepers, overseers, and anyone else whose function is to make things more efficient. Stick your third grabber in their gaping, useless food hole. Slide it in and out a few times and scramble all over their u'uioy-o for good unmeasure. Be as messy and profane as possible as you truly waste their time. And as you finish their coronation, tell them they have fallen out of sync. You will not be lying.
22. Remove head from hotbox. Garnish self with cream. Spread with soil. Serve on platter of flattened aspirations as you grow a tree from your navel.
0. Forget everything you have read up to this point. Memory depends on the concept of thought ordered in time. Do not think. Act. Act and act and continue to act, and you will continue in action like the young do, unimpeded by chromata and splegmata and one with nothing.
document printed with mark 7 laze-oh printer! "Now that's what I call a document."
scrawled in margins:
1 as well. (scrawled in margin) I have numerous different enumerations on the way one transitions from time-dependence to the incorporation of timelessness into one's being, but I will not list it in this space, as there is no time for that here. Consult "Piss-take for a Redshift" for specifics. All one needs to know here is that one does not make the personal transition from time to untime instantaneously (despite the transition seeming instantaneous to an outside observer). Instead, one undergoes a graduated severing from time which pronounces itself in various experienced states of increasingly "darkening" time phases.
The enduring self is propelled at a perceptive escape velocity away from its native white time at such a trajectory that it can ride the "redshifts" of other perceived states of time, and use gravity assists to wind its way around red time, to blueviolet Time, to either brown or grey time, to the unstable black time all in succession; and finally to the murky, actively-collapsing clear time, which is the final time one undergoes before lasping into untime.
Without the assistance of these intermediate states to slingshot around, one may propel themselves into void timespace, which probably just a fancy way to self-annihilate your matter (I say probably because it's not like there's any way to tell where one goes). Anyway this whole aside is simply a formalized, stilted and probably useless heuretic for the idea that essentially, you must annihilate the past and find a way to do so without destroying your current self. I am simply imitating the blathering, self-aggrandizing style of our time's philosophers and anyone else who would label a bunch of words as "Meditation on ___". Look, I told you there was no time for this here but you continued anyway, you mega-shithead!!!
12.2. Die a couple times, recreationally, just to awareify yourself to the feeling of encroaching death so you know what to avoid. I've made myself die three times, so you can trust me on this shit :)
