STORY

STORY

COOL BEACH DEALS!!!
[The Legend of Zelda: The Windwaker - Pirates Theme]
2024-07-25 17:52:55
Profile
Posted by ID #107
Last edit: 2025-07-17 10:37:12

Through perhaps the brightest and hottest day on record, two men amongst a smattering of others could be seen wandering along the boardwalk overseeing the beach, with one loudly complaining...

Cassius
2024-07-25 17:53:27
Cassius Profile
Posted by ID #53
Last edit: 2024-07-25 17:54:31
"I'm telling you, this is why I hate travelling..."
Cassius
2024-07-25 17:55:37
Cassius Profile
Posted by ID #53
Last edit: 2024-07-25 18:03:37
"The sun's too hot, the air's too humid, you walk too much, and souvenirs aren't worth the money half the time. What's even the point, then, if I'm not enjoying myself?..."
"Aw... I'm sure something good will come from this trip for you!"
Joshua
2024-07-25 17:57:16
Joshua Profile
Posted by ID #64
Last edit: 2024-07-25 17:58:28
"I'll make sure of it! Only if you want me to though, I can also leave you alone...!"
"Do whatever, man, you're like the most entertaining thing here. Except for maybe the ocean? I 'unno."
"That's so sweet of you to say! Thank you so much!" 
"Uh. Yeah?" Then, "But even then, it's boring or whatever. Like it's shops or pubs or the beach and, like, I like the beach, but it's never... COOL, like nothing's gonna just come out and send us on some 'adventure', yeah? It's always just boring."
The Stranger is just happy to be listening to people talk while he follows them.
[Party at club bug!]
From nowhere, a small notail jumps between them. "I SEE YOU TWO ARE IN LOOOOVE!!!!!!"
"You know, today is the day of hearts in notail culture!" It was not.
L-429
2024-07-25 18:20:04
L-429 Profile
Posted by ID #107
Last edit: 2025-07-17 10:38:50
The small notail child points to Cassius accusingly.

"HEY!!! DID YOU BUY YOUR BOYFRIEND A GIFT????"
This GROWN ASS MAN JUMPS at the little notail's sudden appearance...
Before regaining his composure somewhat and continuing, "Hey, kid, don't say that so loud! What if there's a rogue tabloid journalist running round huh?!"
"But there is! It's me!"
"I already signed you two up for the love messages in the paper! They're going to go out to everyone tomorrow!"
"AND IF YOU DIDN'T GET YOUR BOYFRIEND A GIFT EVERYONE IS GOING TO KNOW YOU'RE A BAD BAD BOYFRIEND!!!!"
"Then...and...and...and then your boyfriend will dump you and no one will ever ever want to be your boyfriend ever again!"
"If you didn't get your boyfriend a gift though, there's a way out of this!"
"Hey, I'm sure he has something for me! And if he doesn't that's okay too!"
Cassius
2024-07-25 18:36:37
Cassius Profile
Posted by ID #53
Last edit: 2024-07-25 18:41:41
".........................................." This kid is out-dramatic-ing him this sucks. "You know, I was just about to go on about that... Well, kid? Fine! Fine! I'm at your mercy!" He does a stupid little pose, like, hand up to his forehead type of pose. "What li'l gifts have you got for me? I mean for my, uh," He looked at Joshua with a blank expression, "for my boyfriend?"
Stranger looks up at Joshua with pitiful eyes. "Am I...am I a third wheel? I didn't mean to intrude."
Joshua leans twards stranger, "(I've only known this guy for three days, you're perfectly fine, just let this kid have this...!)"
("You've only known him for 3 days......?")
("Oh hohoho! Joshua, you dog, you! You didn't tell me you were a Casanova with the men.")
"Yay! Let me show you the amazing gifts you can get today!!!!!"
Joshua was going to say something to the Stranger, but instead is interrupted by the little notail.
L-429 rolls five 20 sided dice. A 6, 14, 12, 16, and 12 is rolled.

The notail calls a group of creatures before pushing a very large glunk behind them all.

"Aren't these gifts really really cool????? Do you like them?"
"Oh wow!!! Look at all those pets!! These little guys are just dwel-lightful!"
"Glad you like them! So! You'll buy one! No.....You'll buy two!"
"Or else....."
"Ooooooooh..." He seemed entranced by the birds, getting knocked out of the bit. "I mean, yeah yeah buy two? Buying two? We can buy two?"
"Yeah, sadly, my dad will eat you if you don't buy two."
2024-07-25 18:54:12
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Posted by ID #2
Last edit: 2024-07-25 18:56:00

A breath of hot air passes by both of the "lovebirds." Behind them, is a large silver tiger.

Silver Tiger
2024-07-25 18:54:43
Silver Tiger Profile
Posted by ID #2
Last edit: 2024-07-25 18:55:37
The tiger growls lowly, towering over both of them.
Joshua
2024-07-25 18:56:19
Joshua Profile
Posted by ID #107
Last edit: 2025-07-17 10:41:57
Joshua just holds his stuffed Eyegret close to him, almost burying his face in it, "We should probably get those two pets now..."
Cassius
2024-07-25 18:56:31
Cassius Profile
Posted by ID #53
Last edit: 2024-07-25 18:56:46
"Well, luckily for you that's not really my thing, yeah. I mean I didn't really need that much convincing anyway, okay. I'd love two birds?"
"Two love birds for two love birds!!!"
"How romantic! I think this is a good one, Joshua."
Cassius
2024-07-25 18:58:37
Cassius Profile
Posted by ID #53
Last edit: 2024-07-25 19:28:29
He side-eyed the Stranger. Replying to the kid, "Exactly..."
"Why is a child's father a tiger though...?"
Joshua
2024-07-25 18:58:50
Joshua Profile
Posted by ID #64
Last edit: 2024-07-25 18:59:05
"Happy families can come in may forms, this one's just a notail and her dadtiger!"
"My dad is a tiger, and my other dad is a bear, that's just how it works!"
"Wow! A dadtiger and a dadbear! Isnt the world just wonderful?"
"Nature is so beautiful..."
"So this is how it goes. Both of you buy a pet, and then.....you give it to the other one!!!!!"
"But noooooo telling which one you're going to buy, ok! Whisper it to me!"
"And if you both pick the same pet, that means you have to get a divorce!"
"Get divorced, huh... Some stakes..." Then Cassius whispered his choice into the kid's ear.
Joshua
2024-07-25 19:10:39
Joshua Profile
Posted by ID #107
Last edit: 2025-07-17 10:43:41
Joshua whispers his answer to the notail right after Cassius'.
"Oh no......."
"Do you guys want to hear the bad news?"
"Oh... Oh no... What is it, kid? Are we...?" He looked at Joshua with an exaggerated sad face. Fake-sniffling, he continued, "Doomed?"
"Nope! You two are uber duper married!!!!"
"That sounds like doomed."
Cassius
2024-07-25 19:17:15
Cassius Profile
Posted by ID #53
Last edit: 2024-07-25 19:17:28
"I mean what?!"
"But you picked the most expensive pets so now you're both in super debt...."
"Oh."
"Oh well, that's what marriage is like!"
"Now you can be in debt together!!!"
"Go ahead and give each other the pets you picked out!"
"And then, kiss!"
"No yeah, still doomed. Cool!" He looked at Joshua. "Have you..." He motioned towards L-429's goods. "Oh, huh? Okay. Okay!"
("Would you two like me to look away when you....kiss?")
"(It's fine, I'm not...never mind.")
("The real question is if you want to see two men kiss for a... bit.")
("A....bit!? Oh dear....I didn't think you two would kiss for very long...Are we talking over a minute?")
("I thought it would be a quick little smooch....")
Cassius
2024-07-25 19:25:28
Cassius Profile
Posted by ID #53
Last edit: 2024-07-25 19:25:39
He doesn't respond to that. Honestly what did he expect. Maybe he will kiss this guy for a bit. You never know.
"Show gifts. Now." The silver tiger growls.
"Yeah, I need you two exchanging gifts for my video! I want to make an advertisement!" The notail points a camera at the two.
Oh he does not like that camera. "Yeah, okay." With a blank expression he went and grabbed the mushbird that looked like a map and placed it in Joshua's arms, nuzzling it all up like a baby with the eyegret plushie he was holding. "There it's all cosy, yes? It looks perfect with your little eyegret." He did a little pose, smiling now.
Joshua
2024-07-25 19:39:04
Joshua Profile
Posted by ID #64
Last edit: 2024-07-25 19:40:31
"Aww that's so cute, I love it! Thank you!!" Joshua puts the plush eyegret and the mushbird in his backpack and hands over the mushbird he picked out, "kinda reminded me of you in a way! You know how it's dark and cloudy."
("Can...the mushbird breath in that bag...?")
("It's fungus, it'll grow stronger in there!")
"Ok.....kiss!"
"And I'll remove half of your debt."
("If any of you are shy, you could use me as a shield.")
Cassius stared at Joshua.
Joshua stared at Cassius!
"Do you guys know how to kiss....? I can give you both a picture of my dad kissing my dad if that helps...?"
"Try doing this!"
2024-07-25 19:48:16
Profile
Posted by ID #2
Last edit: 2024-08-04 19:54:18
"I never kissed anyone like that before...."
"SHUT UP!!! YOU'RE NOT THE ONE KISSING ANYONE!"
"S-Sorry..."
"Aw, don't yell at him! He didn't know, this is some special kind of kiss!"
"(If that's kissing...) I didn't know that's what it took." He opened his arms wide and pulled Josh into a hug. It's probably not all that pleasant since Cassius rubbed his weird extral head against Josh's. But whatever, it counts, right? Haha?
Joshua
2024-07-25 19:54:10
Joshua Profile
Posted by ID #107
Last edit: 2025-07-17 10:46:52
"Aahhmm..." He kind of just awkwardly rubs his head on Cassius' jacket.
Cassius
2024-07-25 19:55:29
Cassius Profile
Posted by ID #53
Last edit: 2024-07-25 19:56:26
After a moment, though, Cassius pulled away, looking, if anything, a bit perturbed. That hug was horrendous. "...Yay?"
The small notail jumps for joy! "YAY!!!!!! Love wins!!!!"
She then takes out a gun and cocks it back. "Ok now for repaying the second half of the bill we have to go rob a store."
("It is my official decree.....")
("That failure to pay for merchandise is the lesser of the two evils if compared to robbing someone.")
("If you need me too, I shall distract her while you two run.")
("Just remember my sacrifice.")
("Thank you so so so much.I hope to see you soon... and safe!!!") With that, Joshua starts to slowly scoot away.
("I don't think I want to do that, li'l man...") He dashed forward to grab the cekeki and run like mad hell out of there.
Stranger rolls a 20 sided die. A 7 is rolled.

Cassius grabs the Stranger and runs, but stumbles, falling on the ground.

"That's it. It's the end of the line for you! I already got what I wanted out of you!!!" The notail stands over Cassius, points her gun at his face, and pulls the trigger.
L-429 rolls a 20 sided die. A 13 is rolled.
It's over for Cassius...His vision goes dark......
As...he's covered by water.......From a water gun.
Silver Tiger
2024-07-25 20:14:57
Silver Tiger Profile
Posted by ID #2
Last edit: 2024-07-25 20:20:37
The silver tiger grabs the small notail. "Ok, that's enough playing with your prey! It's time for lunch, kitten."
"NOOOOOO!!!!! I WANTED TO KILL ALL THREE OF THEM!!!!"
Joshua runs to grab Cassius by the wrist and get the hell out of there. Assuming Cassius still got Stranger with him.
This piece of shit can't do anything r--oh. He sat up. That's a really convincing water gun. Uh. He liked water. He stood up, frazzled more, now. Then he got his wrist grabbed. "I... can't believe I thought that was... a real gun."
The silver tiger waves at the trio leaving. "Thanks for the footage. See you on the news tomorrow."
"That gun looks very real! It's all black, and it doesn't have a single ring of orange on it! I wonder how many people she's robbed using that...."
"The news? Oh god, I'm never going to beat those allegations."
"I guess we gotta have a honeymoon now that we're married!"
"You can't be serious. Can we go out to sea?"
"Sure, why not!"
"I happen to know a lovely lady who loves setting up dates and honeymoons."
"I'll give the ole Madam a call. She'll plan you the perfect event."
END OF EXPO
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