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Home > Expos > Event 5 > Page 28
WE'RE GOING TO FORTUNA!!!▼
WE'RE GOING TO FORTUNA!!!
[Commercial Music / Advertisement Music]
Collector
"Thanks to your help, we have successfully spawned a whole house!"
Collector
"I mean, it looks more like a store, but you know. You can use a store as a house."
Pondskipper
"Cots are surprisingly pretty cheap when you buy them second-hand."
Collector
"Our house has two, count it! Two rooms!"
Collector
"One will be for my tubuchicks."
Collector
"Skipper can have the other."
Collector
"And I get the living room!"
Pondskipper
"Aww, you sure I can't keep the chickens with us? They're like... airport pillows."
Pondskipper
"With souls."
Collector
"Skipper if you keep them in your room, they'll lay eggs in your bed."
Collector
"And I know what you do to raw eggs."
Collector
"Disgusting."
Pondskipper
"Hey. I wish... Don't rub it in."
Collector
"You know Skipper, if you really want to ea-"
The ground shakes. Another building pulls itself out the ground.
Collector
"O-oh....."
Collector
"...................."
Collector
"Well folks, this just in! We have two, count it! Two houses!"
Pondskipper
2024-12-17 18:28:52
Pondskipper Profile
Posted by ID #107
Last edit: 2025-12-05 22:50:42
"Oh my god. TWO HOUSES?"
Collector
("Skipper, is it supposed to make two houses?")
Pondskipper
("Absolutely not, but I'm not complaining.")
Pondskipper
("More chicken room.")
Collector
"Well, suits me just fine! Two houses! Amazing folks! Keep using the machine and who knows, maybe we'll get a third!"
Collector
("Skipper if we get a 3rd house, are we going to need to become landlords?")
Pondskipper
("I was just about to ask what we'd do with a third house. I was kind of stoked about having more than one room, let alone a strip mall.")
Pondskipper
"Buuuhhhhhhhh HEY! Three houses!"
Pondskipper
"Better than.... one house!"
Barley Bonekeeper
"I'm surprised you people managed to get the machine to give you a house."
Collector
"Do....."
Collector
2024-12-17 18:31:32
Collector Profile
Posted by ID #107
Last edit: 2024-12-17 18:31:39
"Do you just live outside our store?"
Barley Bonekeeper
"We parked next to each other....."
Collector
"Over 5000 ships here and you just happened to park next to us....sure."
Pondskipper
"It must suck to not have three awesome swag houses, dude. I can't even imagine it."
Barley Bonekeeper
"I could have skyscrapers if I wanted to!"
Barley Bonekeeper
"I just didn't want to invest the same way Dad did."
Barley Bonekeeper
"That's why I'm investing in new, better products, and that's why I gave you the machine."
Pondskipper
2024-12-17 18:33:03
Pondskipper Profile
Posted by ID #107
Last edit: 2025-12-05 22:52:07
"I mean, it's clearly working out just fine for us, not sure where your issues lie."
Pondskipper
"Well. I mean. I do. But aside from that."
Barley Bonekeeper
"I know the machine will work. It always does! I want to do something new!"
Barley Bonekeeper
"I don't want to do whatever Dad does. I'm tired of living in Dad's shadow."
Collector
2024-12-17 18:33:52
Collector Profile
Posted by ID #107
Last edit: 2025-12-05 22:52:45
("You ever think about how he's 10 years old? I mean, yeah I know, he's an algorithm, he's all knowing, all stupid, has lived millions of mental years. But dang. He's 10 and having a midlife crisis.")
Pondskipper
("The implication that he's on the way to obsolescence at 10 is kind of sad, yeah...")
Barley Bonekeeper
"My investments are going just fine without Dad's help. I've sold three blockmons! All by myself."
Barley Bonekeeper
"I'm learning to be my own investor."
Pondskipper
"...Oh what, wait, 3? You sold three of those things??"
Barley Bonekeeper
"Yeah I sure did!"
Barley Bonekeeper
"I didn't even have to trick anyone into buying it."
Pondskipper
"That's uh. Shocking..."
Barley Bonekeeper
"I bet you want to buy one now, don't you?"
Pondskipper
"Maybe you'll sell another three by the end of the decade."
Barley Bonekeeper
2024-12-17 18:35:56
Barley Bonekeeper Profile
Posted by ID #107
Last edit: 2025-12-05 22:54:19
"You're going to regret those words when this goes big and you're without a blockmon."
Collector
"Oooh nooo.... Whatever will we do with our highly sellable cekekis and 3 houses....."
Pondskipper
"You should try, like. I don't know. Marketing to your demographic, or something. It's easy!"
Pondskipper
"The market for cekeki is, like, everyone. Blockmon... Could... Use some work!"
Barley Bonekeeper
"Cekekis are built off the backs of tortured artists!"
Barley Bonekeeper
"Blockmons will be honest, and good for artists!"
Barley Bonekeeper
"............When I find them."
Pondskipper
"I love my job, dunno 'bout you."
Barley Bonekeeper
"Blockmons will be more ethical, and everyone will love them."
Collector
"Dude.... You're an algorithm pretending to be a person, you don't have.... Emotions."
Collector
"You're just... Functioning by the little numbers in your head. You're just algorithmically perfecting yourself."
Collector
"By the time you're done, you're going to be a Zookeeper."
Barley Bonekeeper
"That won't happen to me."
Pondskipper
"Speaking of, Barles, what do you even have in mind after you uh, make it big, or whatever? What's your plan after all this, anyway?"
Barley Bonekeeper
"I............."
Barley Bonekeeper
"Don't know what I'm going to do. But I know I'm going in the right direction."
Collector
"That direction being up of course!"
Collector
"No thoughts. Just keep watching the number go up."
Collector
"Just like Zookeeper!"
Pondskipper
("Up, to... To Fortuna?")
Collector
"To Fortuna!"
Barley Bonekeeper
"It'll be different. I won't be like Dad."
Barley Bonekeeper
2024-12-17 18:42:13
Barley Bonekeeper Profile
Posted by ID #107
Last edit: 2025-12-05 22:58:12
"I'll show you!" Barley leaves to head back to his ship.
Collector
"Hey do you think when Barley realizes his mistake, and takes the machine back, will our three-"
Collector
"!!!!!!"
Collector
"Now four..... Houses will disappear with it?"
Pondskipper
"Ah!- Ahh I'm never prepared for how loud that is-"
Pondskipper
"I 'unno. I guess I'll just. Speed up the capsule thing, before he can snatch it away."
Pondskipper
"Sell out and move out before he can confiscate the merchandise, y'know?"
Collector
"Oh for sure. And if we meet up with the boss again anytime soon, let's make sure to tell him to never make a """child""" out of him and some discarded artist pelt he found stuck in the machine."
Collector
"Cause oh boy, this guy is a total mess. I prefer Zookeeper. He doesn't act like he has real emotions."
Collector
"Cause sometimes, this guy says stuff with such passion, that I believe him, until I'm reminded he's just a pile of...numbers pretending to be relatable."
Pondskipper
"Yyyeaahhh. We weren't good enough? I like to think we're more relatable than..."
Pondskipper
2024-12-17 18:44:58
Pondskipper Profile
Posted by ID #107
Last edit: 2025-12-05 22:56:21
The Pondskipper pauses to think for a moment. "...A computer with fur."
Collector
"Tsk, yeah people were really wow'd by us back then!"
Collector
"Remember that Bizz guy when he first saw us? He was all like "WOAH WHAT ARE THOSE THINGS!!!!!""
Collector
"I can't believe he didn't believe that the Boss wouldn't have those capsules filled."
Pondskipper
"I still think we cooould have done better than those one-bedrooms. Those things SUUUCKED."
Pondskipper
"....But, I'll admit, they're still kinda comfy..."
Collector
"Yeah....being in those capsules sucked, but at least we got to see all the important events."
Collector
"Well....hear them."
Pondskipper
"Yeah, uh. It was kind of embarrassing not realizing that Barley's dad was... Always just... Right there..."
Pondskipper
"Just.... Didn't talk......"
Collector
"Anyway, you want to go eat while no one is looking?"
Collector
"Cause I'm starving Skipper."
Pondskipper
"FUCK yes. There's still some leftover rice in the cooker."
Pondskipper
"You mentioned eggs?"

Collector pops open the top of his head.

Out pops a cekeki.

"I hope you know we're cooking those eggs right?"

Pondskipper pops out the top of his own head, body freezing up as it goes idle.

He clumsily tumbles to the floor.

"Aw, c'mon. That takes so much time..."

END OF EXPO
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